


I Wish I Were Kayano

by AkiAkabane



Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: F/M, Heartbreak, Heartbreaking, M/M, Oneshot, Romance, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:40:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26945314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AkiAkabane/pseuds/AkiAkabane
Summary: Karma Akabane has a crush on his best friend, Nagisa Shiota. When he thinks he's ready to confess, he calls Nagisa over to hang out and before he can do anything, a certain blonde interferes. Inspired by the song "Heather" by Conan Gray.~♡
Relationships: Akabane Karma/Shiota Nagisa, Kayano Kaede/Shiota Nagisa
Comments: 8
Kudos: 47





	I Wish I Were Kayano

Karma lay in his bed with his arms folded behind his head, looking up at the ceiling. The only thing that surrounded him was the room temperature air which was incapable of holding him in its arms. His phone lit up besides him and vibrated as it did so. He picked up the rectangular device and looked at the screen. It was a text from his best friend, Nagisa. He felt a familiar pain in his heart as he read the words displayed on the screen.

Nagisa: _'What do you think I should wear on my date with Kayano tonight?'_

"That's right…" he reminded himself. Nagisa was in love with Kayano. He had always suspected that Nagisa was in love with Kayano, but he wanted to believe otherwise. He wanted for the bluenette to turn to him and show him all the signs that he showed Kayano, but in the end that didn't happen. He started to type in a reply.

Karma: _'Try something casual, but not too casual._ '

Karma didn't really want to get into the different types of outfits Nagisa could wear tonight. To him, Nagisa would look absolutely handsome in anything and that's exactly why he couldn't think about it too much. Ever since Nagisa and Kayano started going out, Karma tried to rid his mind of any thoughts of Nagisa, but that was damn near impossible. How could he forget about his soft, azure eyes or his small, muscular body? Everything about him was mesmerizing, but Nagisa was mesmerized by someone else entirely. His phone lit up again so he picked it up and read Nagisa's reply.

Nagisa: _'I think I've found the right outfit. Thanks Karma!'_

Karma smiled, chuckling softly as he put his phone next to him. "If only that were me taking you out tonight, Nagi.~" he turned onto his right side and stared out into his opened window, the sky's multitude of colors putting him in a trance. He closed his eyes and tried to clear his mind as he let sleep consume him. However, his thoughts drifted to that cold winter day that his whole world came crashing down in front of him, breaking him entirely on the inside.

○○○

It was December 3rd. The snow fell softly from the sky, coating the ground and everything touching it in a thin, white blanket that ran for miles. Karma was walking to the store with a red scarf wrapped securely around his neck and a maroon winter coat. He left footprints in the snow covered ground beneath him and it didn't take long before they were covered again by the snowy white ice crystals falling from the sky. A small smirk grew on his face as he pulled out his phone with a certain blue haired friend on his mind. After punching in all the right numbers, he put his phone up to his ear and listened as it rang, waiting to hear his soft, angelic voice that was sure to warm him up. He walked into the store just as the bluenette picked up.

"Hey Karma, what's up?" Nagisa inquired in his usual cheery voice.

"I was wondering if you'd like to come over to my place to have some hot chocolate and watch a movie~?" he said as he grabbed a few boxes of hot chocolate off the shelf along with various other snacks.

"Hm? Yeah, that sounds nice. I'll be there in about 30 minutes!"

"Alright, see you then." Karma said before hanging up.

He had already anticipated Nagisa saying yes to his offer, but hearing him agree made him that much happier. He made his way over to the checkout line and proceeded to buy everything he had grabbed. He then grabbed the bags and left the store.

His small, pale nose had acquired a red hue and his hands were freezing as he made his way home. He didn't let those things bother him though. He was going to get home in one piece and hang out with Nagisa even if it killed him. Every moment with Nagisa was absolute bliss. His heartbeat would speed up every time Nagisa laughed, or if their shoulders brushed up against each other, or even if Nagisa happened to fall asleep, causing his head to fall onto his shoulder. Whenever that happened, he found himself gently running his fingers through Nagisa's long blue tresses, shortly falling asleep after him, his head falling onto Nagisa's. They'd remain like that until morning.

Karma walked into his house and straight to the kitchen to set his groceries down. He figured he had plenty of time before Nagisa showed up so he went to the bathroom to take a quick shower. He stepped into the shower and poured some body wash on his towel. He ran the towel along his muscular body, shivering at the air that brushed against it.  
'Should I make my move today…?' he thought as he lathered his hair up. He had been wanting to confess to Nagisa, he just needed the right time to do it. Pondering whether today would be a good day for it or not, he rinsed off and got out of the shower. He dried himself off and put on a shirt and a pair of sweatpants as his doorbell rang out throughout the house.

He made his way down stairs and to the front door. He opened it and was met with a shivering Nagisa with a dusted red nose and cheeks. Karma blushed slightly at his friend's freezing state then invited him into the warmth.

"You can go wait in the living room while I go get you a cup of hot chocolate."

Nagisa nodded then made his way into the living room while Karma made his way into the kitchen. After he was done preparing the hot chocolate, he grabbed the two mugs, one a pastel blue and the other a pastel red, then walked out to Nagisa. As he walked into the living room, he noticed that Nagisa had wrapped himself in the rather large blanket that he had set out for the two. He set the mugs on the coffee table then looked at Nagi.

"Comfy~?"

"Shut up, I was cold…" He snuggled deeper into the blanket.

"Hey, Nagi.~ That blanket was meant for the two of us, you know~?"

Nagisa pouted. "But it's so warm, and I'm comfortable…how about this?" Nagisa peeled the blanket off himself, revealing the light blue sweater he was wearing.

"You can wear my sweater instead! It's made of polyester and it's really warm," He hugged himself as to prove his point.

"I-I guess I can settle for that."

Nagisa smiled as he pulled the piece of clothing over his head then gave it to Karma. Karma wasted no time putting it over his head and sliding his arms through. Immediately, Karma could smell Nagisa's scent and he wanted to pull the front of the sweater to his nose to get a better smell, but he had to control the urge at the moment.

"Now then, I'm picking the first movie.~"

"Karma, no! I already know whatever you pick is going to be a horror movie."

Karma got up from his spot on the couch and grabbed a dvd case off of the coffee table and opened it.

"You know me so well.~" he said as he put the dvd into the dvd player. He sat back down and watched as Nagisa climbed up on the couch right next to him. He smirked mischievously; he knew if he turned on a horror movie then it would force Nagisa to be as close to him as possible.

The movie started off slow, causing Nagisa to lower his guard.

"This actually doesn't seem so bad- GAH!" he pulled the blanket over his head and leaned against Karma's frame. Karma patted Nagisa's covered head in an effort to soothe him.

"It's just a movie.~" Karma chuckled, his voice laced with fake innocence as he continued to watch the movie.

"It's just a movie.~" Nagisa mocked, nuzzling into Karma's side. "Yeah, well, I'm staying under this blanket…"

Karma blushed before wrapping his arm around Nagisa. He wished he could hold him closer in that moment, so close that they would breath each other in and never want to inhale anything else. Karma found it hard not to pull Nagisa onto his lap or peel the blanket off his head to stroke his cheek lovingly as a way of saying "I'm here" or "If the movie's that frightening then pay attention to me instead.~"

'Should I make my move now…? Or should I wait until the movie's over…? How about before we decide to go to sleep?' Karma pondered to himself, forgetting about the movie almost entirely.

Just as the movie was halfway over and their mugs were empty, their phones buzzed in their pockets. Karma took his out of his pocket and looked at the message displayed across the screen.

Nakamura: _'Hey! I'm throwing a party at my place tonight! Everyone's invited so get your asses over here!~'_

He sighed, putting his phone back in his pocket. Nagisa peeked his head out from the blanket bravely then glanced over at Karma.

"Hey, did Nakamura just send you a text too about a party at her place tonight?" Nagisa asked.

"Yep. Did you wanna go…?" Karma asked, sadness lacing his voice.

"Well…yeah! It's not often that we get to hang out with the rest of the class outside of school so why not?"

There it was, the statement that put their night together to an end. Karma couldn't bring himself to tell Nagisa that he didn't wanna go and that he'd rather stay there and spend time with him. Instead, they found themselves turning off the tv and folding the large blanket before setting it on the couch.

As they stood in front of the door, putting on their winter attire, Karma noticed that he still had Nagisa's sweater on while Nagisa only had on a t-shirt.

"Hey, I almost forgot." Karma said as he started to pull the sweater over his head.

"Wait!" Nagisa yelled, causing Karma to stop and look at him. Karma watched as Nagisa looked him over before speaking again.

"It looks better on you than it looks on me. Keep it on." Nagisa smiled as he zipped up his coat. Karma turned around, red dusting his cheeks as he put on his coat.

'If only you knew how much I liked you, Nagisa…' Karma thought before turning around to face Nagisa again. The atmosphere he had created for the two of them had been ruined along with any plans of telling Nagisa how he truly felt.

"Ready.~?"

"Ready!"

They both smiled as they left Karma's house and started their walk to Nakamura's. It was silent as they walked until Nagisa tripped on a rock, causing him to grab onto Karma's arm as he stumbled forward. Karma instinctively tried to grab onto Nagisa when he tripped, but the bluenette stopped him with his sudden contact. As the walk continued, there still was silence between the two until Nagisa decided to say what's been on his mind for a while.

"Hey, Karma? Why'd you invite me over today anyway?"

"Huh? Well, we haven't hung out in a while so I thought it would be good to do so…"

"I'll have to come over some other time then since our time was cut short today."

"Good idea.~"

Nagisa giggled as they stepped onto Nakamura's porch. Karma rang the doorbell as Nagisa looked up at her house.

"Whoa…"

Nakamura opened the door and smiled. "It's about time you two got here! Everybody's already here!"

They blinked. "Eh? That was fast," Nagisa said as Karma and him walked in and took their shoes off at the door along with their coats and scarves. They walked about two steps from the door when Nakamura shoved two drinks into their hands.

"I actually informed them a little earlier than you too, but still, have fun!" she said as she pushed them towards the living room. When they walked through the doorway, they saw the rest of their classmates mingling with one another. It was surprising no one was seated on the couch so they both took that opportunity and sat on it. Karma took a sip of his drink and looked around.

"I don't see Nakamura anywhere," he grumbled. "You'd think the host of the party would be out here with all of us right-" Karma looked at Nagisa only to find that his gaze was transfixed on something else. Just then, he followed his gaze across the room and his blood ran cold. Kayano had just walked by with Kanzaki. He looked back at Nagisa and watched his eyes follow her across the room. She had him mesmerised and Karma didn't even question why; she was beautiful. It pained him to see that someone else had caught Nagisa's attention. She was glowing brighter than Karma ever could. He wanted to die right where he sat. He'd rather do that than watch his best friend fall in love with someone else right in front of him.

"Nagisa-" Karma called out to him just as he rose from his spot on the couch. He was too focused on Kayano to hear Karma. He walked over to Kayano and started talking to her as Kanzaki walked away to find Isogai. Karma sat there and watched as they talked, laughing every once and a while at what was said. Karma could still smell Nagisa's intoxicating smell on the sweater that he was wearing. He had loved it up until that moment. It made him sick while he watched the events unfold in front of him. Pulling it over his head, he folded it up neatly and placed it on the back of the couch. Sparing one last glance in Nagisa's direction, he left to go find the kitchen for another drink.

Once he came back, he stood in front of the couch and looked around it for Nagisa's sweater which had disappeared from its spot on the back of the couch.

"H-Here Kayano…" Nagisa said as he gave the sweater to Kayano. Karma whipped his head around at the sound of Nagisa's voice and watched as he gave the sweater to Kayano. She pulled it over her head and put her arms through the correct holes.

"Thanks Nagisa! I was getting cold." she said, arms dangling at her sides. Karma's eyes widened as he watched as Nagisa stepped closer to her and grabbed her hand, entwining his fingers with hers. A blush rose to both their cheeks as they gazed deeply into one another's eyes.

Nagisa broke his gaze as he let go of her hand. Karma watched carefully as Nagisa then put his arm around her shoulder. They started walking into the back of the house and Karma followed them with his gaze until they were completely out of sight. It was then that his heart shattered into a million pieces. He wanted to run after them, to rip Nagisa away from her and call him his, but then what would Nagisa think of that? He'd probably hate him and cast him aside. That's the last thing Karma wanted to happen. He felt envious of Kayano, but he couldn't bring himself to hate her; he just couldn't. What has she ever done? She's beautiful and sweet and he's pretty sadistic and likes to tease Nagisa, but only because the reactions that the bluenette had were adorable; he lived for them. Even though he couldn't bring himself to hate her, a small part of him kinda wished she were dead. Then maybe Nagisa would look his way. His thoughts drifted to where Nagisa and Kayano went. His first guess was that they disappeared into a room together to get better acquainted with each other. The thought of Nagisa touching Kayano, even kissing her made his blood boil. He wanted to be the one to press their lips together softly only to deepen it and press their bodies together as he hungrily bit at his bottom lip, wanting more only to break the kiss and cuddle with him, whispering sweet nothings to him that would mean everything to the little bluenette.

"Why would he ever kiss me…? I'm nowhere near the type of person Kayano is…" he thought as he leaned his back against the couch. He pulled out his phone and sent a quick text to Nagisa, telling him that he was heading home before he got up and left Nakamura's house.

As he walked down the street, the amount of snow that fell from the sky grew greater. A single snowflake landed on Karma's nose as he turned the knob on his door and walked in. After he took off all his stuff, he headed up to his room. He opened the door to his bedroom and that's when he broke down. Warm, hot tears ran down his face as he walked over to his bed. He calmly sat down as the flow of tears grew stronger and he did nothing to stop them. Nagisa was no longer available to him and that made his heart ache. Did every moment they spent together mean nothing to him? Or did he really see them as just friends? Karma lied down on his side, glancing out of the window as the moon's rays shone through, illuminating the room with its cool glow. He closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep. That way, he didn't have to deal with how much his heart hurt. Just before he lost consciousness, the hot tears stopped falling as the pain in his heart became less evident.

"I wish I were Kayano…" he muttered before falling asleep with a broken heart and a stuffy nose.


End file.
